Simple Ways to Connect with your Kids

Life as a parent can be so busy, but today I want to offer you some simple ways to connect with your kids.  I love to listen to podcasts and audiobooks and recently I heard something that has really stuck with me.  The number one factor as to if a child will continue to follow the Lord as an adult was not perfect family devotions, a perfect discipline system, or the number of verses memorized.  The number one factor was family warmth!!  I don’t know about you, but when life is busy and chaotic, the warmth can vaporize from my home.  So with the goal of family warmth in our minds, today I want to spend our Mom Moments talking about something I do believe cultivates warmth…intentionally connecting with our kids.

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What is meaningful connection?

I have four kids.  I don’t live in a very large house.  In order for me to connect in a meaningful way I need to have individual time with my kids.  To make connection and add to our family warmth, my kids need to have my eye contact, my full attention, and as minimal interruptions as possible.  Having these times takes an intentional effort, but is so worth it!

 Ideas to create connection with your kids:

1.  Mom Time-

We started doing this just this year and it has been such a game changer for our after school routine.  How it works for us is when we come home from school, we typically have snack time.  While my kids are eating snack, I pull them one at a time over to the couch and set the time for 5 minutes.  During this five minutes they can tell me anything they want to about their day.  Sometimes I ask questions and sometimes I just listen to their excitement.  I also make a intentional effort not to correct or redirect them during this time unless absolutely necessary.  This time is just about connecting with them.  We rotate through and each person gets their five minutes.  It has really helped cut back on their fighting for my attention after school.

 #2- Back and Forth

This is a great strategy for those kids who are not in school yet and are home with you all day or for weekends when your kids are home.  The reality of life is that kids often want to have fun with you but you may have lots of other tasks you are responsible for.  So we started to play back and forth so both of us could get what we wanted.  We set the timer for 15 minutes.  My child gets to pick whatever they want to play or do together for that 15 minutes.  When the timer goes off, it’s my turn to work on my project!  My project doesn’t have a time limit though! I have found that my kids are much more willing to play independently after they have had time with me.  After I am done with my project, my child gets another 15 minutes to play with me!

#3- Mommy and Daddy Dates

The last idea we use to foster connection with our kids is Mommy and Daddy dates.  We rotate through our kids and one kid each month will get a special date with Mom or Dad.  What we do depends on the child and what they like most.  We generally try to have a special meal with them. Then we do a special activity together.  We may go bowling, put put golf, art studios, or movies.  I try to think ahead of time about some good conversation questions so we can try to have some fun things to talk about that will bring out even more connection.

 What other ideas do you use to make meaningful connections with your kids?  I share these ideas as someone who can naturally gravitate to my to do list over taking the time to connect.  It can seem so unproductive, but I think all of us as parents know that there may be no more important time in our days.  Happy connecting friends.

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