New Year, New You?

It’s a new year, and that means you are probably hearing the phrase, “New Year, New You” everywhere.  People are talking about goals and resolutions!  I tend to be more Type A so this won’t be a post against making goals each year.  But I don’t love the phrase, “new year, new you.”  You don’t need a new you!  Can we all learn and grow?  Sure.  But the phrase “new you” makes me feel I need to make overwhelming change immediately. 

It makes me think of my list of goals a few years ago.  I wanted to start working out five days a week, be more consistent in reading and prayer, and wake up early to work on a few blog goals.  By the end of the first week I was so sore and exhausted that I literally wanted to cry.  I remember a good friend reminding me I didn’t need to do everything all at once.  Since that year, and through some trial and error I have found a path that is kinder and helps me actually make lasting change.

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Make Goal Categories

The first thing I do when thinking about goals for the next year is think about the different categories in which I want to make goals.  For example, I usually make a goal for my physical health, my spiritual health, my business, and my family life.  Your life is different than mine so you will probably have different categories than me.  Just think about what areas of your life you want to grow in and you will have your categories!

The next step is to begin thinking about one goal you have in each category.  I strongly recommend you sticking to just one goal for each category.  Do you want to make exercise goals for your physical health.  Do you want to make a goal to start reading more?  Do you want to grow in some way in your role at work?  Starting with one goal in each of your categories will help you be more successful for the whole year instead of doing all the things for one week and then quitting!  

 Start Small instead of New Year, New You!

Once I have an idea of one goal I want to have in each of the categories of my life, I try to think of how I could get to that goal in small steps.  Success breads success and finding ways to make small steps towards your goal will lead to lasting change!  When I think back to my new year where I went all in on all my goals at once, I laugh!  Of course I couldn’t maintain all that change at once!  Change is hard for even the most flexible of us!  We operate on habits!  What I wish I would have done was make a small goal first.  I could have found some success and built on that.

If you are stumped trying to think about how to make small steps toward your goals you can think about frequency, division and road blocks. Frequency would be like the example above.  If you have a goal to do something every day, please don’t start with that expectation in mind.  Make a goal to do it 2 or 3 times a week to start, with the goal that you will be doing it every day by the end of the year! 

Another way to break your goal into small steps would be what I call division.  Maybe you have a big goal for the year.  For example, I know friends that have goals to read a certain number of books in the year.  To break that into small steps you could divide out how many books you want to read in a month or even in a quarter to meet that goal.  This approach is dividing your big goal into manageable chunks. 

And the last way I try to make small steps is by thinking about road blocks.  For my spiritual health I want to make sure I am spending time journaling every day.  I could take some time thinking about what road blocks keep me from this goal.  Do I need to try a new journal format that is more engaging?  Maybe I need to find a new time to do it?  Looking at my roadblocks may help me identify a new way to try to achieve success. 

Evaluate and Adjust

The final step in my goal making process is to evaluate and adjust.  I was talking to a friend recently about how easy it is to focus on our failures or mistakes.  The days I don’t workout or  the circumstances when I don’t meet my goals.  And we can act as though every day is a failure!  But the truth is usually somewhere in the middle. This is why tracking our goals and evaluating our progress is an important part of the process that most people skip!! 

After you have gone about a month or at most a quarter, I suggest that you look back on your progress to your goal.  If you are rocking that first baby step then it’s time to add another baby step towards your goal. On the other hand, if you are struggling with your first baby step then it’s time to evaluate what could help you meet your goal.  Is there an even smaller step you could make towards your goal?  Could there be something else you could adjust to help you meet your goal?  Or do you just need to make a different goal?

Real Life Goals 

How does this look in real life?  One of my goals for the year is to figure out how to exercise on the days that I substitute teach.  My first baby step may be to workout at night one of the weekdays when I sub.  If after a month I am doing great with this, I can add a second day of working out at night. 

However, if I am not doing well with working out one night then I could either adjust the frequency by maybe working out one of those days every other week.  Or I could adjust by looking at my roadblocks.   Perhaps I am just so exhausted on the days I substitute that I don’t have energy to workout.  In this case, I could adjust my goal and  workout on a weekend day which I typically take off.  Or maybe I am not enjoying the type of exercise I am doing which therefore makes me unmotivated to do my workout.  I could make a goal to try new kinds of workouts to find one I like more!  This process has helped me achieve my goals in a much kinder and more effective manner and I hope it can help you too!!

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